I love organising things like the Internet...

I apologise to the untold legions around the world who’ve undoubtedly missed me updating this blog over the last couple of weeks. I can imagine the disappointment! The sad fact is I’m having a lot of trouble having the Internet connected at home.

Here’s the situation:

Conversation 1 with Telia, early last week.

“Hi, I have my mobile phone with you and want to have the Internet connected as well.”

“Sure! What’s your address?”

I tell him.

“Yes, we can connect to that address. Which plan would you like?”

I tell him.

“Okay, that’s all I need to know. We’ll send you out some papers to sign and it should be on in around ten days time. If you want to ring to inquire about the progress, please do.”

“Thank you. I will.”



Conversation 2 with Telia, last Thursday night.

“Hi, four days ago I ordered an Internet connection and was told some papers would come out for me to sign and send back. Nothing has arrived yet.”

“Okay, what’s your customer number? I’ll check what’s happening.”

“Umm, actually I don’t have customer number…”

“That’s okay. Your address then.”

I tell him and he comes back shortly after…

“Umm, I think you have received no papers yet because we don’t connect Internet to Frederiksberg.”

“You don’t??”

“No. I’m sorry.”

“Oh. Okay. But the guy I spoke to…”

“Sorry.”

“Hmm. Okay.”

I hang up. I just want the Internet! I feel cut off from the outside world – well, my old, regular outside world.

As luck would happen, I turned on the TV in the living room when I woke up the next day (Friday), et voila! An ad for an ISP. I frantically jot down the number.

Later, at work, I give them a call.

Conversation 3 (I forget their name, will update later)


“Hi, I had booked the Internet with Telia…” And on I go, relaying the Telia saga.

“That’s fine. We can have it on for you by next Friday and we do connect to Frederiksberg. Now I have all your details, I’ll have it mailed out to you. It’s easy to install and you don’t have to wait for papers to be signed etc.”

“Fantastic!”

I am over the moon to think I’ll be able to catch up with people in seven days time! And this guy was very friendly and organised.


Then I came home Monday night to find the Telia papers had come in the mail. It was too late to ring.

I arrived home Tuesday night (late) to find a note from Danish post saying I had a parcel from Telia to collect.

OMG. How insane. This is turning into a circus.

Do I keep Telia or go with the new place? If I do decide to keep Telia, will it actually work????

Grrrrrrr.

I’ve yet to ring Telia. I have too much on but I am hoping the alternative Internet provider ‘stuff’ will arrive tonight.

But can you see the next drama? I shall be stuck with both, paying a squillion crowns a month for the privilege.

I should also advise newcomers to Denmark that none of the ISP sites in Denmark are translated into English, so keep your dictionary handy!